They Have Put Love Into the Water


Viikko 13



MotionTHB that Love is impossible to find in the contemporary West
Role: Chair (opp.)

Dear Assemblage, Chair(wo)man, Ladies and Gentlemen,

How to find lasting love? The trick is to have a humane, right attitude to the problematics of lovematching (not the same as love-making, if hastily heard/read). In the following speech I will give my own outlook on it.

(I write about a woman, but do substitute a male or female love interest according to your gender, which includes ”minorities”.)

The first thing is to understand the importance of the head. Listen to your prospective woman, how she talks and how she expresses herself, not forgetting what motivates her and what missions she does have. If she has no missions, she’s probably a whiney wahine. Stay away from her in that case. Under no circumstances commit to her in a familial-legal manner. So, do prioritise what lies above the neckline.

Next comes the middle area around the heart. Feel your woman. Take note of the contours of her heart, wallet, social circle and human relationships. This area has also to do with eating disorders. Stay away from women who have not overcome them or are (in the process of) developing them. Contrary to testimonials, it is entirely possible to overcome one’s prior disorders (of the juvenile variety) and start cooking and eating healthy, hearty meals. However, anorexics get one thing right to their credit: caloric restriction is the key to a fulfilling and sound life that lasts long.

The last thing is the area below the belt. Basically it’s just an aggregate of droopy flesh that hangs from the crotch. You may ask her and yourself simple questions like: ”Are you OK with your sexual self?”; ”Do you skimp on sex or allow it to yourself more than once a year/decade?” If the answer is Yes you may proceed with mating and copulating.

The problem with people today is that men start their woman-hunt by staring at the mid-region, centering on the wallet. This thing has been ”confirmed” by Henry Laasanen among other academic (men) in their controversial books on the subject of pair-formation and courtship. Capital, be it sexual or financial, seems to be the gravity that pulls people together. The result is a divorce rate that lies astraddle the 50-percent line. One half of marriages, in other words, are tied into a knot in vain and futility by the officiating priest. Somebody should shout from the audience when the priests ask about if there are any objections.

Unfortunately, people do not care nor take note of what I’m saying here. Their eyes are trained to look @ potential partners in the order of facecrotchcleavagebum (crack) → legsbosom → neckmind. Their eyes wander like lemmings. This way they will frequently if not always fall for the wrong candidate.

If you take my advice, start looking @ (each) other (people) from top to toe. You don’t have to stare, in particular if the other person is rough to look at, but it may help. Only, remember that, even if ”there is no consumer protection in human relationships”, you are not obliged or supposed to buy a ”pig in a poke”. Start by looking at what you understand about the ”merchandise” and not just what you imagine there to be ”under the covers”.

Puheen kesto: 4 min 18 sek
Arvio: * * *. Puhe yrittää todistaa hallituksen esitystä vääräksi esittämällä ja kehittämällä itse ne kriteerit tai määritelmät, joilla oikea löytyy. Näin se ei hae tukea objektiivisesta vaan subjektiivisesta arsenaalista. Tämä ei ole kiellettyä, vaikka se voikin olla hieman harvinaisempi ratkaisu. Lähestymistavasta omaperäisyyspisteitä, mutta itse puheessa voitaisiin onnistua ehkä paremminkin.



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